Progress

It has to be said that I think that progress is being made. Since writing the last entry there has been good days - and bad days. Days where it felt like time was just stretching before me, not doing anything nor going anywhere. Feelings of what do I do with myself today or mostly,  I'm feeling very odd and really unsure about how I feel - is this normal? has been quite common teamed with some very low points. I think this was most of my Friday and Saturday - which got better with seeing my work colleagues, family and spending quality time with a very good friend Saturday evening. Sunday was very odd indeed, with both and Ian not feeling ourselves at all - despite me not experiencing any side-effects from the chemo.

However - Monday was a complete turn-around with me seeing my friend for coffee, chatting to mum on the phone and for the first time in a long time carefully attempted exercise - which I normally thrive on for as this is a good mental uplift as well as having physical benefits. This left me completely exhausted but I felt
exhilarated and pleased with myself. These positive feeling continued today (Tuesday) - and grew as I had arranged to spend 3 hours at my work attending a training session. I don't think I have been so pleased to set foot into a hospital environment - shame I don't have the same feelings when attending my treatment sessions! I sat through this session taking on-board information that hopefully I will be able to retain and use in the future - and at the same time amazed myself with my previous knowledge that I was able to recall and put this together with the new info and actually made sense of it all - especially as this training session was aimed at experienced nurses who have been in the environment for 2-3 years. Came home and having the fire re-started of nursing set to my workbooks with much enthusiasm. I have started to plan the rest of this week as I feel that certainly most of the side-effects from chemo has now left - all apart from this continuing thirst every night. For any of you who might be experiencing the same journey I have tried drinking isotonic drinks during the night - which does seem to reduce the need of fluid - an indication of the body needing the additional electrolyes this drink offers that water does not.  

I can now recognise a pattern developing for the on-coming months of chemo of the side-effects, good days and bad days and I feel better equipped at dealing with this for when the next round of chemo is due. I think this round of chemo hit me hard as this was something I did not plan for but had mentally prepared myself for the surgery. However, now I know what to expect I also know how to deal with it. When the good days are good - as it has been for me today - it is very good. As expected when the bad days are bad - it seems as this never ends.  I am extremely grateful for all my friends and family who have come up trumps with the never-ending support. It is also during these times the bad days are kept to a minimum. Again, for those experiencing this journey - having a support network really is extremely important as this helps not just you but each member of the family who is directly affected by what you are going through giving then the strength and courage to keep going.  I know that my current positive and upbeat feeling will not last as the next round of chemo is always looming around the corner but just knowing how to get through these dark days should keep the not-so-nice parts at bay and in perspective.

So - until I need another rant - sorry blog entry - will write again soon!